Posted on October 14th, 2025

 

The holidays have a way of sneaking up while you're still catching your breath from the rest of the year.

 

One minute it’s crisp October air, the next it’s twinkling lights and nonstop reminders of joy, love, and togetherness.

 

For anyone nursing a breakup, that cheery backdrop can hit like a cold slap. Everything from a jingle in the store to a commercial about “coming home” can poke at wounds that haven’t had time to close.

 

But here’s the thing: just because the season shows up with bells and glitter doesn’t mean you have to pretend everything’s fine.

 

Feeling off balance right now doesn’t make you weak or dramatic; it makes you human.

 

Heartbreak doesn't follow a calendar, and this time of year has a sneaky way of stirring up old memories when you least expect it.

 

Still, there's something about the season's pause that gives you a quiet nudge to slow down and pay attention to what hurts, but also to what might come next.

 

What You Can Do To Heal a Broken Heart Before The Holidays

Heartbreak doesn’t schedule itself around holidays. And when everyone's gearing up for celebrations, it can feel like you're stuck watching life move on without you.

 

The contrast between how you feel and what the season expects from you can be disorienting.

 

This time of year tends to amplify what’s missing, so tending to emotional wounds now can make a real difference. You don’t need to pretend to be okay, but you also don’t have to stay stuck in the same loop.

 

Healing isn’t about snapping out of it or distracting yourself with tinsel and plans. It’s a slower process that starts by giving your emotions the space to show up.

 

That includes sadness, frustration, loneliness, or even guilt. Let them pass through instead of pushing them down. You’re not broken for feeling deeply. You’re just working through something that mattered.

 

If you're wondering where to begin, here are a few ways to start rebuilding from the inside out:

• Talk to someone who gets it. A friend is good, but a relationship counselor can help you unpack the layers without judgment.

• Move your body. Even short walks or light exercise can interrupt emotional ruts.

• Revisit something that once made you feel like yourself. A hobby, a playlist, a book or whatever reminds you that you're more than this moment.

• Write it out. You don’t need to be a poet. Just getting the thoughts out of your head and onto paper makes a difference.

The goal isn’t to erase the pain. It’s to make it manageable. There’s no prize for speed here, and no fixed timeline you need to meet. Some days will sting more than others, especially with familiar traditions creeping back in. That’s normal.

 

Let those days pass without assigning them too much meaning. Small steps count, especially when you’re trying to find your footing again.

 

As the holidays draw near, give yourself permission to change how you show up. This might be the year you skip a few events, keep things quieter, or start something entirely new.

 

What matters is that you’re responding to what you actually need, not what the season tells you you should feel.

 

Healing a Broken Heart Through Relationship Counseling

Relationship counseling offers more than a place to talk. It creates a structured space where you can sort through the emotional fallout of heartbreak, especially during a season that tends to stir everything up.

 

With a counselor, you're not just venting; you're untangling. A trained therapist helps you connect the dots between what you’re feeling now and what you’ve experienced before, showing you how certain triggers became so deeply wired.

 

One of the biggest strengths of counseling is the clarity it brings. As you talk things through, patterns start to surface. You begin to see why some moments hit harder than others and how your reactions are tied to more than just this breakup.

 

This insight gives you something solid to work with. Instead of bracing for emotional ambushes, you start learning how to spot them early and handle them with more control.

 

Counseling doesn’t stop when the session ends. A good therapist will give you tools you can actually use that make a difference in real time. That’s especially helpful around the holidays, when emotional landmines are everywhere. You might be juggling expectations from family, dodging awkward questions, or dealing with memories that show up uninvited. Having a plan for those moments changes the game.

 

Therapists often introduce mindfulness techniques or simple breathing exercises that can help you stay grounded. These aren’t just feel-good extras. They’re practical ways to stay present when your mind wants to spiral. They also reinforce one of the most important things you’ll take from counseling: a stronger connection to what you need, not just what others expect from you.

 

As you move through the process, you’ll likely find a deeper sense of self-awareness. That kind of insight doesn’t just help you now; it sets you up for better relationships down the line, relationships built on clarity rather than old emotional habits.

 

The holidays might still come with tough moments, but you won’t be walking into them unarmed.

 

Healing through counseling isn’t about fixing what’s broken. It’s about sensing it well enough to grow from it. That growth doesn't just help you get through this season; it gives you the tools to build a better one next time.

 

The Importance of Relationship Counseling During Holidays

The holidays tend to magnify whatever’s already sitting under the surface. For anyone moving through heartbreak, the season’s focus on family, love, and connection can feel like salt in the wound.

 

You might find yourself playing along at gatherings, smiling through conversations, all while carrying around emotions that don’t fit the festive script.

 

This is where relationship counseling becomes especially useful, as it offers a steady, judgment-free space to unpack what you're really feeling, away from the pressure to perform.

 

Counseling during this time isn’t about escaping holiday stress; it’s about meeting it with tools that make it more manageable. A therapist helps you tune in to what’s actually going on internally, not just what the world expects from you.

 

That kind of awareness is powerful. It allows you to show up differently, even in spaces that used to drain you. With support, you can begin approaching social situations with a little less dread and a bit more confidence.

 

One of the biggest advantages of therapy during the holidays is learning how to hold your ground. When family relationships resurface or people push boundaries, having a game plan makes a difference.

 

Counselors work with you to create strategies that help you speak up for yourself, say no when you need to, and prioritize your well-being without guilt. These aren’t just holiday skills; they’re life skills that stick with you long after the tree comes down.

 

What counseling also does well is normalize the emotional messiness of this time. There’s no pressure to rush healing or tie it up with a bow. Instead, sessions focus on building resilience, strengthening emotional awareness, and helping you shift from just getting through the season to actually reclaiming parts of it for yourself. That might mean redefining what tradition looks like or simply choosing peace over pressure.

 

As you go deeper into therapy, you’ll likely start seeing more than just relief—you’ll start seeing progress. Your ability to handle tension improves. Your sense of emotional safety grows.

 

And slowly, the holidays become less about survival and more about choice. Counseling gives you the space to grieve, reflect, and rebuild on your terms, turning the season into an opportunity for clarity rather than chaos.

 

Find Peace After Heartbreak With Barbara J Lanz Counseling Services

The holidays can be heavy when your heart’s still healing, but they can also mark the beginning of something better.

 

You don’t have to fake joy or ignore the ache. This season can be about reconnecting with yourself, your needs, and the kind of peace that doesn't depend on anyone else’s timeline.

 

Healing doesn’t mean erasing the past. It means learning to carry it differently, with more clarity and less weight.

 

Counseling creates a space to do just that. With guidance, you’re not just processing pain; you’re building emotional muscle that helps you move forward through the holidays and well beyond.

 

Each session gives you room to pause, reflect, and rebuild in a way that feels honest and doable.

 

If you’re ready to start, we’re here to help. Book a counseling session with Barbara J Lanz Counseling Services and take the first step toward feeling more grounded this season.

 

You don’t have to deal with emotions alone. A personalized approach, grounded support, and clear strategies can turn uncertainty into forward momentum.

 

If you have questions or want to speak with someone directly, reach out at [email protected] or call us at (239) 317-5533.